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………were the words that were coming to mind after an hour of this match.  We didn’t look like we could beat Rhiw Syr Dafydd’s year three team such were the schoolboy errors we were making throughout the first sixty minutes. But what transpired for the rest of the game was a comeback straight out of a Boys Own Christmas annual leading to the Dale snatching victory from the jaws of defeat in the very last minute of injury time in a truly absorbing encounter at the Monmouth Sports Ground

I don’t like Monmouth. It’s not the cosmopolitan nature of the folk there or the delicatessens and patisseries that line Monnow Street; in fact I worked there for a couple of years so am used to the place. No, it’s the fact that we haven’t won out there in a number of years and always seem to capitulate like schoolboys in front of a Kelly Brook calendar making the journey home seem to be one which you wished you never had to make.

Things didn’t seem to go our way when we met at the clubhouse. Crippa was knocked down by a bout of Manflu and was dosed up with Calpol, Elliot hurt his ankle kicking a feather and Luke, Ashley and Josh were too hung over to make the match as they had been drinking Shandy Bass the night before. We did though have a tump of forwards and we all set off for the border on the big white bus, but it did struggle such was the weight it was carrying.

Playing against a strong wind in the first half the Dale didn’t start well and were soon behind after four minutes. The home side pushed deep into the Dale’s 22 and with a scrum on the five metre line their outside half took and floated the ball out to their outside centre whose straight line was picked up by no-one and he sailed in under the posts for a converted try to take the home side into an early 7-0 lead.

On seven minutes Oakdale fronted up well and showed some strong defending in the middle of the park. This forced Monmouth to concede a penalty for not releasing and Simon ‘The Big 200’ Veall stroked an excellent penalty attempt over against some challenging winds to close the gap to 7-3 to the home side.

Monmouth nearly added to the tally soon after the restart when Veall’s clearing kick from defence was charged down. It was only the quick thinking of Anthony ‘Billy’ Isgrove that denied Monmouth a second score when he ran back and collected the ball just short of his try line and was able to reset the play with the help of his forwards for Oakdale to get out of their 22. Everyone looked at Veall and tutted noisily.

Oakdale could not though stop the Monmouth onslaught when they conceded a second try on seventeen minutes, Monmouth targeting the centre of the Dale defence and able to get over for a converted try to extend their lead to 12-3.

It took the Dalel twenty one minutes to realise that the abundance of forward players on the field was going to bring them success. A combination of tight play, good hands, good recycling and patience saw them mount attack after attack towards the Monmouth line and a fine try arrived soon after, scored by top try scorer and the enigma that the call Scott ‘Roly ‘Evans. Veall missed the conversion but this closed the gap on the hosts to 12-8.

Straight from the restart Veall contrived to nearly banish himself from the village of Swfrydd for the rest of his life. Having been passed the ball his job was to clear the ball out of play and restart the match back up the field. The first part he got right but what he didn’t plan for was hitting the little lad that was stood on the side of the pitch. What he also didn’t know was that the little lad was known to everyone as the Son of Tovey. Fortunately for Veall, Dai showed glimpses of the goalkeeping talent that brought him an under sevens district cap when he played for Treowen Stars and he dived to his right like Bruce Grobbulaar in the 1987 European Cup Final and saved his boy from certain disfigurement.  Dai look menacingly at Veall but Veall didn’t look up for fear of disfigurement himself

Veall had to face the angry Dad though minutes later when he was yellow carded for a deliberate knock-on which broke down a good Monmouth attack. He sheepishly walked over to the Dale side of the field but made sure he kept his distance from Dai.

Oakdale were under the cosh again on 26 minutes when Monmouth kicked a penalty deep down onto the Oakdale five metre line. From the resulting line-out they over threw the ball and Roly managed to pounce on the loose ball. Like a back row forward he flicked it up to super winger and pretty boy Captain Gav and he struck a delightful ball out of defence. Everyone thought it was going into touch but Gav and his back line partner Gav knew otherwise. The ball bounced inches from the touchline but bounced back into the Ginger Prince’s hands. He handed off one defender and was able to stay ahead of the next and ran all the way into the corner for Oakdale’s first try of the game. Twinny did a little dance move but Simon Barber missed the conversion, although Oakdale were doing well to go into the lead at 13-12.

The points kept coming and three minutes later Monmouth surged back into the lead. Some woeful tackling allowed a Monmouth player to coast through the Dale defence and go over for another converted try and the lead was taken back by the home side with the score at 19-13.

 With 34 minutes on the clock it was try time again, this time for the visitors. From a Dale scrum just on the halfway line the ball found Barber and he drew the home side defence and then popped the ball inside to his blind side winger Gavin Hipkiss who was charging through like a good looking George North. He broke the defensive line and passed back inside to Barber who kept the play alive by feeding the supporting Gethyn Hockey. When he was tackled the ball was quickly recycled and fed out to Roly. He boshed a couple of players and then fed Dai Fortune who had the legs to stride over the line to score in the corner. Barber sent the conversion through the posts from just inside the touchline and Oakdale unexpectedly drew level at 20-20.

It would have been a result if the Dale had gone into half-time in with the scores level but it was not to be. Monmouth showed great desire to regain the lead which they had held for the majority of the first 40 minutes and with two minutes left on the clock they did just that. With some sustained pressure and strong running they scored the next points of the game with an unconverted try and went into a 24-20 lead.

Oakdale though, did have one more chance to cut the deficit when Veall made a good break in injury side. Throwing an outrageous dummy he sailed through the first line of defence and went looking for the line. He was eventually tackled just short and lost possession. Monmouth should have simply opted to clear their lines but decided to run it out of defence. They made the error of holding onto possession on the floor and were penalised on their 22 metre line. Surprisingly, Veall ‘The Big 200’ gave Barber the opportunity to stick the penalty attempt over but his effort sailed wide and Oakdale went into the break just behind their hosts in terms of points scored.

HALF TIME SCORE – MONMOUTH RFC 24 V 20 OAKDALE RFC

Oakdale started the second half in positive fashion and were making some good yards through effective play but that was all undone by Gareth ‘Psycho Jeff’ Evans who conceded two penalties and received a good taking to from the Ref from being, let’s just say, a bit over-exuberant.

Everyone seemed to be following Psycho Jeff’s lead and the Dale were conceding too many penalties for the supporters liking and on 55 minutes they paid the price for their wayward approach when Monmouth slotted over another penalty attempt to extend their lead to 27-20. This was followed on 62 minutes by another home side penalty after yet another indiscretion by the Dale and at this stage in the match everything seemed to be going wrong for the visitors and their play was fragmented, disjointed and a win was not in the thoughts of any of the Dale’s supporters such was the standard of play.

With 15 minutes left on the clock I was hoping maybe for another try and a loss by seven or less to at least go home with two losing bonus points but from somewhere, and I don’t know where, Oakdale mustered the attitude, motivation and conviction to mount a serious assault on the lead their opponents held and for the last quarter of an hour of the game the Dale gave it their all and some more.

With a five metre penalty awarded to them they first sent Roly at the Monmouth defence in the hope that his considerable weight would carry him over. When it didn’t they fed Ryan ‘The Juggernaut’ Jarman but he spilt the ball when he took contact giving Monmouth back the possession.

With two minutes of normal time left, Oakdale found themselves once again in the Monmouth half and looking for more points. When the home side’s defence held strong the Dale sent the ball out to their backs to make some hard yards. What they found out wide was ‘supersub’ prop Anthony Slocombe. Slowkey demanded the ball to go looking for some contact and the ball duly fell into his hands. With one thought in mind he ran forward but it seemed that no Monmouth defender wanted to make the tackle. When they had no other choice Slowkey stood tall, took the contact and took the Monmouth players over the line with him to score Oakdale’s fourth try of the day. Veall set his conversion out wide and tried to bring it in on the wind. It curved a mile but not enough to go through the posts but the try closed the gap on the home side to 27-25.

It was now a ding dong frantic affair with both side determined to take the victory. Monmouth though were gifted the chance to extend their lead straight from the kick off when Oakdale were again penalised for holding on the floor. For what seemed a simple attempt just to the left of the posts the Monmouth kicker made a hash of it and sent the ball wide. All the Oakdale players ran to one side of the field for the 22 restart but Veall had other ideas. He took a quick tap and fed Gavin Price who then fed Dai Fortune who by now had found himself in the Monmouth half. When he tried to keep the attack alive he was cruelly thwarted by a stray Monmouth hand, the move broke down and the Ref blew his whistle. The Ref had no choice but to yellow card the guilty player as Veall had suffered the same fate for the same indiscretion in the first 40 minutes. The penalty was definitely in a kickable position but when Ginge questioned the Ref’s parentage he took offence and reversed the penalty to Monmouth, denying the Dale the chance to pinch the lead.

With injury time ebbing away there was only one last chance for the Dale to snatch victory and they mustered up every last ounce of effort to give it a damn good go. Every player who received the ball made yards and every supporting player was in the right place at the right time. With the line in sight everyone wanted the chance to score the vital score but it was only when the ball found Marcus Parkin that the anticipation levels grew to a frenzy. He will tell you that he beat four men sidestepped another and swallow dived over the line but in reality he used his hulking frame to crash over the line much to the delight of the travelling support. Grown men were seen weeping as Veall stuck over the conversion to take the Dale back into the lead at 32-30 but the Ref still found time on his watch to allow the restart. Oakdale were resolute in defence and determined not to give away any penalties and when the first wave of Monmouth attacks broke down the Ref brought the game to an end and the Oakdale hands punched the air in delight.

FULL TIME SCORE – MONMOUTH RFC 30 V 32 OAKDALE RFC

The pessimism that prevailed at the start of the match with our poor record out at Monmouth was not allayed for the first hour of this game. Yes we scored some tries but our overall play was not up to standard. Although, credit must go to the numerous players who played out of position, especially in the backs. Monmouth our not our bogey side as we do well against them when we play them at home but their ground just seems to make us unorganised and we ship poor tries and always leave ourselves a mountain to climb. Hopefully, this match might just prove to be a turning point when we play them away and we can start to look forward to the long trip to England.

Cost of entry to the game - £3.00 – I’ll always grizzle when it is this much. It’s not like they need the cash when they charge £3000 for a shirt sponsor and £70 for a junior player to play the game.

Quality of Matchday Programme – Very good. Printed exclusively for the game as it had the fixture on the front cover and the Chairman’s address mentioned us in his notes. Only two pieces of glossy paper and they took our squad from our internet site. But they also have a season’s booklet available from the clubhouse so I can only commend them for their efforts

Quality of aftermatch meal – Mmm Mmm Mmm! Thai Chicken curry and rice. We had to walk down the road to the boys school dining room but were offered a free can as there was no bar there ( a nice touch). But the star of the show was the curry. Lots of chicken and lots of flavour and probably up there with the best meal we are going get this season. Well done ladies